Let me set the scene:
I am in my fourth and final semester at Seneca College. It had been a particularly mild March thus far, and I was on my way to school this particular Monday morning, ready to attend an early class. To do so, I had to catch the GO Bus from Square one which would take me right to the school via the 407.
Sweet ride.
Anywho, to get there early enough to be able to grab some Timmy’s and a bagel, I catch the 6:50 bus, which getting up for and getting to is an adventure in and of itself.
This is where our hero’s adventure begins.
You see, often times while on the early bus, I like to recline in my seat, close my eyes, perchance put in some headphones, and have me a quality nap. Things were different this time.
This time, I would die.
It turned out that, without my knowledge, a fog had rolled in a few minutes after I had lost consciousness. Now, when I say fog, I’m not talking that pussy Sunday morning, old lady, doily fog that you kids today are used to. This stuff was the kind that I am pretty sure you could climb if you really wanted to.
The world had become a giant, fluffy whitish-grey cloud-puff. Yeah, scary shit.
Anyways, all this was going on while I dozed peacefully in my bucket-seat. Awesomeness.
To make sure that I didn’t miss my stop, I woke slightly, and looked out the window to get my bearings. Now, keep in mind that I was probably working on about 3-4 hours of sleep from the previous night, and by this point, it’s maybe 10 after 7, so suffice it to say my wits were not quite about me. I looked out the bus window, and could see –at most– 3 feet of road to the side of the bus before the world dissipated into a shapeless, grey mass. Random trees on the side of the highway stood concealed behind this cloudy curtain, their outlines sometimes just barely being distinguishable.
In my just-woken state, I came to the only logical conclusion, given the circumstances:
I had died.
Yes, that’s right; I woke up on a near-empty bus, looked out the window, was met with a wall of fog, and the first and most acceptable thing I could think was that clearly I had died on the bus, and was now on my way to wherever it is one goes when they die on the 6:50 am York University GO Bus.
I started thinking deep thoughts about life in general…good and bad memories I had, regrets and joys, and all the other things that someone who just died would think about (assuming that’s how it works). This carried on for what seemed like an eternity (I’m dead, remember, so time has no effect on) when suddenly, the bus came to a sharp stop.
Without saying anything, I got off, and stepped into the fog, naturally assuming that the next part of my journey was about to begin (you know…the whole boatman across the River Styx thing…). Ahead of me, I could see a dark form silhouetted just beyond the fog. As I made my way towards it, its shape became clearer, and I could see that it was a glowing sign.
Knowing that I had to move closer to see what it was telling me, I did so, until I could clearly read the words:
WELCOME TO YORK UNIVERSITY
I checked my watch: 7:45 am.
“Awesome, still have time for a bagel.”
And thus ends the story of my brief encounter with the afterlife.
Dyko
P.S. In a STARTLING DEVELOPMENT, there may be some changes on the horizon for all of my wonderful “What’s a Dyko?” readers! I can’t go into much detail yet, but let me just say that there’s a chance that I’ll be sub-letting my blog to a friend of mine, and the two of us will be working jointly on our blogs all housed within this page. Shit, I just ruined it, didn’t I? See, that’s why we can’t have nice things…
